Transition

I haven't recorded as much of this pregnancy as I wanted to! Time is just flying by super fast, and as excited as I am to have Zoee here with us, it feels a little too fast and I will miss being pregnant. I just love EVERYTHING about!

I love that my feet hurt so bad in the morning
I love that I have to prop up my huge belly at night
I love that I can feel her little (and frequent!) hiccup episodes!
I love that I have to pee every 10 minutes
I love how huge, swollen and firm my belly is!
I love love my pregnant body!
I love how my hips have just spread to about 5 times their width all on their own
I love how she pushes her little feet so hard against my right side that it feels like they are going to pop through and it actually hurts a little!
I love that I have hiccups 24/7
I love how Shawn talks to her and touches my tummy
I love the look in his eyes he has whenever he looks at me now
I love how I can't really bend over
I love how I have to turn sideways to do dishes!
I love how I have to sit with pillows behind me
I love everything about being pregnant!!

 Leaving my job was very very hard. One of the hardest things I have ever had to do. I will liken it to when I stopped going to martial arts and stopped competing in kickboxing. This is actually still a very touchy thing for me. I feel like I was so skilled, talented and passionate in it. I was MADE to do it. And it didn't last nearly long enough. I don't think I will quite get over it. My job was the same way. It helped me become who I am today. I am so proud to have worked there and touch lives, but I think they touched me WAY more. I could go on and on about it, but I don't feel the same amount of dread as I did with the kickboxing retiring, and I think I realized it's because this is totally right for me and for my family. (We are about to become a family! :D ) And I know it is the right thing to do and what the Lord wants of me. ALL of these things have prepared me for this. This entry into motherhood, and I am so so grateful for that. I cannot look at that and not see that Heavenly Father has directed every single pathway to bring me here. Heavy, I know, but I think that is why I feel the way I do now. It hasn't hit me all at once, but will little by little - at least until she is here! It is this beautiful and surreal feeling of being "in between." Even this morning, it felt SO weird to not have to get up and go to work...especially at the start of a new School Year. My brain is still going through the motions of work, it is so weird! So it felt a tad out of place to not physically be there...like muscle memory but for the brain. Does that make sense? It's just wild. But I love it. I always love every single sensation of life. It is so magical, miraculous and such a gift! I am looking forward to the next few weeks of getting my house and heart ready for this precious little soul. My precious baby girl!